The Gift of Life: Part Two

Meanwhile, while I was completely immersed in my teenaged mutant ninja hermit phase, my family was sure I was going crazy (and some days I wondered if they were right...but now I know that I was totally fine!). So they took me to numerous specialists and eventually, after testing half a dozen meds, had me put on a one called Effexor XR. It numbed me to a place where I was neither excited or sad. Just a steady dullness enveloped my every waking moment. I even stopped having dreams at night for years on end.  I remained on that medication for nearly 7 years. I think that while under the influence of its spell, I didn't have the wherewithal to realize that I was being totally compliant with leading a very dull and unexciting existence. 

During that time, at age 22, I unexpectedly conceived with my partner. I consulted with several doctors who said that my original prescribing doctor (or any other doctor at all???) should have explained the severe risks involved with pregnancy and this medication. I was furious. I felt so uninformed and totally abandoned by the western medical system that we all accept as "normal". After weeks of strong encouragement from doctors, and with mountains of sadness and guilt, we decided to end the pregnancy. That choice still brings up many strong emotions for me. Throughout the years, I have done counseling, journaling and healing work to forgive myself and everyone else involved in that life-changing event.

THEN...eventually I had a spark of awakening and inspiration in 2007, at age 25, and weaned myself off of Effexor, which took me nearly 6 months of pulling one more micro bead each day out of the tiny capsules (my own idea). I learned what patience meant. It was very powerful stuff and the withdrawal symptoms were horrific when I tried to wean off of it the way that the doctor instructed me to. I still wonder to this day what long-term effects it may have had. Anyone know about this??

In summarizing this info, I urge you to avoid unnecessary Rx medication of ANY KIND.  INFORM YOURSELF AND SEEK  NATURAL ALTERNATIVES TO PHARMECEUTICALS WHEN POSSIBLE. They may save lives as a last resort, but please, please do your homework before handing over that little Rx sheet. There are dark sides to many, many common medications. 

Since those Rx days, which ended in 2007, I have been excitedly rediscovering my special gifts and skills as if for the first time. I liken it to relearning to walk or talk, or use motor skills after a severe injury. I had squashed them down in a deep, guarded compartment for many years and tried to pretend that I was "normal".  

In fact, until a month ago, I still didn't fully realize the full extent of who I really am and what I have to learn and share with humanity. In early June, I attended a workshop that I happened to see advertised locally titled "highly sensitive children". It was geared toward parents who are raising kids with special abilities such has telepathy or clairvoyance. I knew immediately that I had to attend. All I can say is that the day was a huge game-changer for me. I spent at least the first hour in tears from a wild combination of reassurance and disbelief that there are probably millions of others on the planet who share a similar experience of life with me!

By the end of the workshop, I was full of excitement and eagerness to learn more about this human phenomena and to build connections with others from the group and beyond. 

I have since been asked to host some workshops on this topic myself, which was an unexpected turn of events. I have heard numerous times that whatever our deepest hurts have been, that these are the things that we can share with others to help change the world. My calling seems to lie somewhere between guidance counseling and supporting fellow HIGHLY SENSITIVE PEOPLE.  

Do you or someone you love share similar experiences with what I have described? Please pass this on to those who may benefit from reading this. I  am always happy to work with anyone who is interested in learning more. 

Alongthehearttrail@gmail.com