In Remembrance

A special man left our world last week. My father-in-law passed away at home in northern Alberta. I only knew him for a year, but he left a very big impression on me, and hundreds of others, too.  He was full of wisdom, humor and love, and lived to share these with others. 

I remember the first time I met him. It was just over a year ago. It was cold and snowy, but his big mustached smile and hearty bear hug lightened my soul. He was so excited to meet me. I felt like a celebrity during that visit. And most visits thereafter. What a warm welcome.

Luckily, I was also warned about his mean cribbage skills, and I practiced up all of last winter. I was no match for him. But I had fun trying. When we moved up north last spring, I spent many, many hours challenging his mighty crib skills. Mostly to no avail. I think I won a mere half-dozen games in those 6 months. But who's counting?

I often cooked meals in his kitchen. He would sit at the counter, playing cards vs. his iPad while I chopped and stirred.  He was always excited to be my taster when I made up new recipes.

On numerous sunny afternoons, we stood on the deck and reflected on life's challenges and blessings. His perspectives were always appreciated, though not always agreed upon. His advice to enjoy every day and not work like a dog until you die were dually noted.

One morning, I sat at his kitchen table writing one of these blog posts. He asked what I was working on and I told him about my blog. He asked me to show him how to read it, so I offered to subscribe the blog feed to his email. Two days later I asked him if he read any of the blog posts. "I read every one of them", he said. "You have some very interesting ideas. Keep it up." That was very encouraging.

The day we told him that we would be departing northern Alberta and heading for the West Coast was a sad day for him. We knew he loved having us just outside his back door. 

Life pulls us all in different directions, yet we keep a piece of each other in our hearts. We both had a feeling that we may not get to visit him again on that autumn day when we drove the moHo away from the farm toward the coast. Life was calling us to somewhere else, and we answered.

We are so thankful for the gift of quality time with family and friends. How many families have feuds that have been dragging on for months or even years? How many arguments go unsettled, then suddenly someone passes away?  Is there an axe wedged in your family tree that is preventing members from getting along? Is it about something trivial? Have you forgotten why you are even angry with each other?  Ask yourselves if it's worth the ego battles, or if loving each other outweighs being right. Life is short. It's been said a million times. Because it's true. If your family nemesis was gone tomorrow, would you have regrets?

At his remembrance service, we were escorted into a community hall where hundreds of faithful friends and community members came to show their gratitude and respect. I was amazed. I don't even think I know that many people, let alone be blessed enough to have that many show up at a memorial service. That says a lot about a person's life. When you are gone, what kind of legend will you leave behind? When you leave the world, will it be a better place than when you checked in? That is my hope for all of us.